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Do you allow change?

July 2018

The Greek philosopher Heraclitus already knew: "Change is the only constant".
This is obvious in nature. No day is the same.

That also applies to you and your life. No day is the same.
You grow, you get older, you develop, your ideas about life change and your life changes with it.

At least.......that's how it should be.

Holding change

But sometimes things don't go the way you want and you get stuck somewhere. Everything around you changes, but with you everything stays the same.
How is that possible?

Of course, this is only possible if you stop the changes yourself.
In and around you the changes continue, but you make sure that they do not affect yourself and your life. You make sure that everything stays 'the old'.

There can be several reasons for this:

Whatever the reason:
right now you are not living your best possible life, the life that is aligned with all the life around you, the life you were born for.
And you are not moving towards it, because you are blocking all possibilities for change.

Interaction with other people

Everything and everyone around you changes, but you don't want to change.
Natural changes follow a natural process that you have little or no influence on. So they just keep going.

Changes in life, in your life, in society, are shaped by us, people, through interaction with each other. That means that you can meet people who, together with you, can change something in life.
But because you want to leave everything as it was, things 'collide' between you and those people. The changes do not occur because the interaction does not lead to results.

And then when you meet people that you really need to get on with your best possible life, or who really need you to get on with their best possible life, you will meet those people over and over again.
Those encounters will start to feel more and more awkward, as the differences between you become greater and greater. As well as the need to get moving in order to be able to realize the changes desired (for everyone).

Postpone change

You can maintain the status quo for a very long time. You can put off change for a very long time.
For example by pointing at others. It's the other person, not you (never you!), that a meeting feels very unpleasant. The other will have to change his or her behavior and otherwise you just don't want to be around that person (or people) anymore.
You're going to avoid interacting with people.

By putting the cause outside of yourself, you avoid having to come to the painful conclusion that it is you yourself who causes you not to live your best life and thereby also prevents change for others.

There will come a time when change is inevitable, even for you.
You are then forced to change. You can't stop it anymore.
And that won't be nice.

What do you need to allow change?

Meeting people who don't feel comfortable is an opportunity to investigate what exactly is going on.

Why doesn't this meeting feel good? Don't point at the other, but investigate your own share in the situation.
In other words, take responsibility for your part of the interaction.
You may wonder what the purpose of the meeting was and what exactly didn't feel right.
What change(s) did the other person try to bring about in you? In which direction did the other want to put you (unconsciously) in motion? And why do you resist that change?

It's time for change. Are you putting yourself in motion again?

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